strings attached

*sigh*.............lately i've started developin a whole new wave of outrage....



@ my fate

@my failure to convince

@ my naive nature(but i was too young to understand bck then)

@ my inhibitions

@my life

@what i'm forcd to become

@th amount of strength n tym tht m gna nedd to start all over again

i nevr wanted 2 b stuck up....held back....ruled over....be a doctor
my parents always tld me...kid u can do whatevr u want, b whoevr ur heart tells u to be....go wherevr ur imagination takes u to....but i guess these r just their ways of "playin wid our minds"....fake ways of givin us fake independence n freedom whih they ultimately end up snatchin a few yrs down the line..
hav always bin a big planner...jack of all trades but master of none...
not tht m complainin!
i was pretty happy wid myself...
evn though i knew how limited my life was...i always found a way 2 let my mind stroll about in the infinity...
but they had to hit the wall at one point...
i can nevr 4get a line which i had heard in sum movie once....it ws addressd by a parent to another...he sed "v r only our kids' guardians...hukumat...nahi hain!"
how i wish i got such sensible n liberal folks of my own! :P

its bin a long tym since i felt these feelings again...i was almost gettin habituated wid the life my parents enrolled me in2...
but heaven forbid tht evr happened!
i hav2 push myself to the limits now....start all over again...
free my heart of fears...my mind of its inhibitions. i hv2 ...i will. i aint obliged to anyone for nethin. i know i owe this life to em...but i aint gna b repayin by killin who i am. afterall they gave birth to an individual n not a keep-our-name bot...
my dreams,my passions,my individuality.
they need no names ...no qualifications...no horizon
n they r here to stay...n be a part of me fr as long as i live
to kill em wud b a cruel deed indeed! as i wud b killin a part of me

freedom
independence
individuality
overwhelming bliss
not a puppet.............not any more

why is it that once in a while someone comes n totally shakes u up from the inside? someone inspirational or someone totally insane. someone totally out of the ordinary n v just fall for their utter crap! y is it tht v give so much of importance 2 some1 tht v either end up lovin em or hatin em? y do v lose our sense of wrong n right 4 a fraction of a second n mess evrythin up? y in this whole friggin world do v not give it a second thought n c wat a huggeee mistake v r committin?! n as a result just end up kissin somebody else's ass n suckin up 2 em?!
well i guess thts cuz v r all a bunch of stupid monkeys. a bunch of brainless mindless sexist motherfuckin monkeys tht is.
ne idea what m talkin bout? of course not!
well m talkin bout ppl! men 2 b more precise! tht utterly disgusting n despising race! assholes! they'd lick ur feet in the beginnin n then spit the soot right back in ur face afterwards!
y those rascals!!!!......i can kill half of the male population right now! n u know y?? no u don't!
cuz i hate men that's y!!!
bloody assholes!
kill em all i say!!!!!!!!!
KILL EM ALLLLLLLL!

friggin hollow
friggin dead
friggin fucked up in the head

friggin exhausted
friggin frustrated
feelin friggin exhumated

feelin lost
wanna go home
wanna lie down
n nevr get up

T_T

i am who i am

coz of the denials, deceit, ignorance, push aways

all the regrets tht i harbour
all the rejects tht i'v been granted

all the distance, all the chills

all the lies, hypocricy
all the mcs

all the knock outs, all the blackouts

all the refrains,restrains the .........

u get the point ryt ;)

day zero

*yawwwnn*

tis bin a long tym...
actually 1 helluva long tym...
how can one get so bloody lazy n nonchalent bout stuff
well i can...i know i do..
n tht saddens me...
aww poor lil silly ol me...

actually...evn sympathizin wid myself....um..thts a blasphemy man!....i mean...evrythingz ryt thr... ryt thr in fronta me...yet i prefer 2 just ignore stuff n indulge in a blissfull negligence...
shame on me i say!
shame on nebody whose like me!....

but i guess initialisinz a big part of evrything... n here i am ..."initializin" my assests....whatevr tht meant :P


ever wondered y life's boring??.....hm...lesse tht myt b cuz ...mayyyy b...jus this speck of a chance kinda may be.... ur not doin nethin!?
stop blaming others n bullshittin bout sum lack-of-oppurtunity speech

guess m jus writin shit!....n darn it man! it feels gooooooood!
i still hav it in me! :D
woo hoo!

this lil piece of gibberish myt not mean nethin 2 u dear reader....but haha! 2 me..! it feels like i'v found a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow!
all hail the leprechauns!!